Friday, May 20, 2005

The Revenge Of The What?

Ok, I have to say that one thing that really, really, REALLY bugs me is when members of society obsess over something. What’s the latest obsession, you ask? It’s this

Yes, the Revenge of the Sith. It cracks me the hell up to watch news report, after news report, after fucking news report interview people that have been waiting in line for this movie since like January. Don’t these people have jobs? Honestly. How does one make a decision to give up a month or two of their lives to wait in a fucking movie line. Did someone not give these people all the information that they needed to make an informed decision? Like the fact that this movie is coming out FOREVER. No, it’s not a limited engagement. They’re not going to put a moratorium on it after the first week. It will be out from now until you die. After it gets done playing in the movie theaters, it’ll come out on DVD and you can watch it again and again.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Star Wars. I’m more partial to the three episodes I saw as a kid, but it’s one of the last of a dying breed – the epic saga. Think about it, what epic sagas are left? There’s basically Harry Potter (which I don’t know if you’d consider epic), The Lord of the Rings and Star Wars. I’ve never seen LOTR, but I’ve heard enough good things about it to have a vague interest. It’s just who has three fucking hours to sit down and watch a movie (I mean besides the crazies that spend months in line to see a movie that they’d be able to see anytime from now until the end of time)? Of the three left, Star Wars has to be the biggest, wouldn’t you say? It’s made billions upon billions of dollars, not only in movie sales, but in merchandising as well. It’s a huge brand name. I know that anything that has the Star Wars logo, picture or characters on it is automatically wanted by my kids. Actually, they bug the shit out of me over this, which is fine. They bug the shit out of me over a lot of stuff they see on TV.

The upshot is this, if you’re able to take a couple months of your life and stand in line waiting for a movie (most of the time in full Darth Maul garb), you should re-evaluate your life choices. Rest assured that when you are interviewed on TV looking like a Stormtrooper in a hockey mask, I am sitting at home pointing at the television and laughing my ass off at you.

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