Friday, May 14, 2004

Hello There

~Turns ridiculous looking hat uncomfortably askew~

Hello there, friend. Listen to this. My best friend and I were playing a rousing game of basketball, you know playing a pretty darn good game, when this girl and my girlfriend stopped by the park. She was driving my convertible. This gentleman that was on the opposing team took notice when she got out of the car and goes over to her as if to ask her out. I then politely stepped in front of him and said, “Please refrain from doing that, friend.” He asked, “Why would you ask me that? Who is she?” Trying not to make this gentleman mad, I replied, “She is the love of my life and bearer of my child.”

Now you can tell this gentleman has a lot of money just by all of the flashy jewelry he’s wearing. And to top it off, he isn’t a bad looking guy, so naturally my girlfriend was taken a little aback. She said, “That guy is very nice looking. He’s just a good looking guy.” Sensing danger, I felt I had to get her out of that situation. I switched the subject, “Here’s some money. Go to the mall and buy me some tennis shoes, please. After I’m done playing basketball, I’ll come home and cook us dinner. If you would like to make love after that, we can. After all, no means no.” When she heard that, she looked at me lovingly and said, “I love you so much.”

When she left, I breathed a sigh of relief as the gentleman said, “Your girlfriend is really beautiful, you’re a lucky man. Whereas I feel a little pang of loss here, don’t worry about me, there’s plenty of fish in the sea.”


Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
Douglas Adams- Posters.
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